Lubbock's Library
by kuragari nikkou
Summary: Lubbock discovers the literary tastes of the Night Raid members. Some he expected, and others...not so much.


Everything © their respective owners

(l…l)

KN: I'm pretty sure Lubbock is a bookworm, and no one can tell me otherwise. This was based on a headcanon my friend had about Lubbock's favorite genre.

 **Warning:** My genre choices are pretty predictable.

(l…l)

Booklending's a cover, but it didn't mean he couldn't enjoy the job while he had it. There was much one could learn in a position like Lubbock's. Not just from the tomes themselves, but from the ones who chose to read them as well. Genre says a lot about the reader.

For example…

"Oi, Leone!" Lubbock picked up another discarded book in his path, stacking it atop the already high tower of texts in his arms. "At least put the smut books on a shelf when you're done with 'em!"

"I tossed them to the floor where they belong," Leone lounged across the sofa, tossing another book to the ground, "'cause they were terrible."

"People don't exactly read these for the plot, you know." Lubbock pointed out, shelving the books away.

"You would know, huh?" Leone teased.

Lubbock blushed slightly at that, turning away from her with a frown as he picked up the book she threw. The cover wasn't as different from the rest. It was a naked woman in a suggestive position that looked more disturbing than arousing. In his years of assassinations, he knew a girl would break her back if she bent _that way_. The content was just as unnerving as the cover as well. Guess you _can_ judge a book by its cover sometimes…

"Why do you still read these if they're so terrible anyway?" Lubbock asked.

"They're kind of funny." Leone answered. "The guys in those books are bigger losers than you are, but they get way more action!" She grinned as if she was congratulating herself.

"Tch!" Lubbock pouted as he re-shelved the book. "How long were you waiting to say that punchline?"

"It's your own fault for setting it up." She said in a sing-song voice.

If Lubbock didn't know any better, he'd say Leone read all that terribly written erotica just to tease him.

(l…l)

"Lubbock," Akame said in her usual cool tone, "did you get any new cookbooks?"

"Yeah, three of 'em!" He answered, handing her the aforementioned books. Lubbock had been a little surprised at Akame's admittedly feminine interests considering her penchant for training, hunting, and fighting. It wasn't unwelcome, though. She calmly flipped through them and…did she drool a little?

"These two will do," she handed one of the books back to him, "but this one's no good."

"Eh?" Lubbock had rarely seen her reject a cookbook. "What's wrong with this…one…?"

The title of the book read, _Veggie Lover's Guide to Healthy Eating! No Meat Allowed!_

' _Oh…'_

"Tonight we will have thinly-sliced pork wrapped around meatballs on kebab sticks." Akame decided dreamily with her arms around the two cookbooks. Now that Lubbock thought about it, those two books _did_ specialize in meat dishes.

' _I don't know why I feel so disappointed…'_ Lubbock stared blankly into space.

As Akame left, he flipped through the vegetable cookbook to see if he could try to make something for himself later tonight. He wasn't a vegetarian, but he wasn't a carnivore either!

(l…l)

A pink silhouette caught his eye, so he followed the unusually bright color. Unsurprisingly, the silhouette turned out to be Mine, though what she was here for, he wasn't sure. She didn't look like the type who enjoyed reading. Either way, she had a big book in her hands.

"Ooh, these look nice…!" she flipped over to the next page. "Oh, but these are cute too."

Lubbock strolled over to take a peek, but kept a fair distance so as not to startle the sniper. The colorful photos of lace and frills on dresses gave away the fact that Mine was looking at a fashion catalog. Leave it to Mine to have girly hobbies and pick books that didn't even have words.

"I should pick up one of those the next time I go shopping." Mine closed the fashion book and set that aside. She then pulled up a much larger reference book on heavy duty gun maintenance.

' _Well, I guess that makes sense too…'_ Lubbock thought.

Mine took out a gun assembly kit and put that together under eight minutes easily. She rarely even looked at her reference book as well.

"Hmph, piece of cake!" She grinned.

' _She really is a genius…'_ Lubbock had to admit. _'Not that I'd ever say it to her face. Wouldn't want to inflate her ego any bigger.'_

(l…l)

"Hey, Sheele!" He greeted her. "What are you reading today?"

She was sitting by the coffee table with a book in her hands. She always came over to the store at around this time, and every time she looked the very picture of refined intelligence. And that was saying something considering she was mostly a cute klutz.

It would be nice to actually have someone he could talk to about the books they read, and his fellow reader was a kind and pretty girl too!

"Today?" She echoed. "I've been reading the same book everyday."

"You have?" Lubbock looked at the book in her hands.

The title read, _'100 Ways to Fix Airheadedness.'_

' _Oh…'_

"Um, Sheele…?"

"Yes?" She looked at him expectantly.

"You _do_ realize that you're reading it upside down right?" Lubbock pointed out.

"Ehhh?!" She looked back at the book in disbelief. "You're right! No wonder I haven't learned anything useful from this book!" She then turned it downside up. "Thanks, Lubba."

"No problem, Sheele." He smiled despite himself.

So much for having a fellow reader to talk with, though…

(l…l)

It was rare to see Bulat in the store (considering he always trained so much), but it was also rare to have mystery and horror novels in stock. The empire lacked any kind of mystery since _everyone_ knew of its corruption, and there was no shortage of real life horror stories either. But one does get writers for the two genres every now and again.

"I can't believe Sonnet was the killer!" Bulat threw his hands up in the air. "I thought she loved her sister too much to stab her in the back like that. _Literally_."

"Well, isn't it because she loved her sister that she did it?" Lubbock noted. "And with the sloppy way she tried to cover it up, it was only a matter of time before she got caught."

"Expected nothing less of the famous Detective Lockhart!" Bulat smiled. "No one can escape her deduction skills and ability to find cold hard evidence."

"I wonder how she's going to solve the ongoing case of the smiling demon."

"Oh yeah, whenever that guy comes around, there's always a bloodbath." Bulat shook his head. "It makes the series seem like they're trying too hard to be 'dark' and 'edgy.'"

"At least they're switching it up from a standard mystery of the volume." Lubbock pointed out. "I just hope the writer stops trying to kill off all the characters."

"Yeah, it stopped being tragic about five deaths ago." Bulat nodded. "I know they want us to feel sympathy, but it's hard to get attached to characters we know next to nothing about."

"Well, what are you going to do?" Lubbock shrugged. "It's nice to have another fan of the series. I kind of thought you'd only read that one thing the girls like…um…. I think it was called yaoi or something."

"…why would I want to read that?" Bulat narrowed his eyes.

"Er…nevermind, that was a dumb comment." Lubbock dismissed it. Bulat held his gaze for a bit longer before letting the subject go.

"So, what's the newest horror book about?" Bulat asked.

"Oh, this one's terrifying!" Lubbock pulled the newest book off the shelf. "It's about this kid who collects masks, but the masks are actually people's faces." He handed the book to Bulat. "Good luck going to sleep after reading it."

"I'll be fine!" Bulat assured him. "A man doesn't feel fear over something silly and fictional! But," he winked, "if you're ever having problems falling asleep, my bed's always open…"

"No thanks!" Lubbock quickly answered. Bulat burst out laughing.

"You're pretty jumpy for a couple of jokes!" The older man even left the store laughing.

Lubbock wished he could've had someone to talk to that didn't hit on him, jokingly or otherwise…

(l…l)

Teasing the newest recruit to Night Raid tended to be one of the more fun pastimes. So he was going to sneak up on Tatsumi while the boy was looking at the shelves and surprise him, but the book the kid was holding caught his interest more.

It was a fully illustrated encyclopedia with large hand-drawn pictures of flowers. Lubbock didn't peg Tatsumi as a nature-lover type, but it seems the kid's origins as a country boy went pretty deep. There was something odd about Tatsumi's reverent silence as he looked through the pages, though.

"Yo, Tatsumi!" He ended up surprising the newest recruit after all, making Tatsumi drop the book. "You thinking of giving Mine flowers or something?"

"Eh, why would I want to do that?!" Tatsumi blushed as he picked up the encyclopedia. Upon closer inspection, Lubbock could see the cover displayed both flowers and beetles. That was an odd combination…

"Oh, so you want to scare Mine with beetles or something instead?" He continued teasing.

"N-no!" Tatsumi denied. "I just…" He looked down at the cover. "Back in the village, Sayo liked finding different flowers, and Ieyasu really liked catching different beetles…" Tatsumi explained with a small smile on his face.

The smile disappeared from Lubbock's face. Shoot, did Tatsumi still think about his childhood friends even now? Well, it was hard to get over losing the people you grew up with especially when you're someone as naïve as Tatsumi…

' _I messed up…'_ Lubbock thought, rubbing the back of his neck. Well, he couldn't baby Tatsumi and let him cling to his friends because that kind of thing got assassins killed. And their newest recruit hadn't been here that long yet, so losing him due to a careless mistake now would be the worst.

Tatsumi re-shelved the book quietly, and Lubbock decided he liked that even less.

"Hey, why don't you keep the book?" He offered.

"Eh?" Tatsumi turned to him with his eyebrows raised in surprise. "Won't the person who lent this to you want it back eventually?"

"Probably, but I'll pay them for their troubles, so don't worry about it." Lubbock explained. "The girl who lent that to me has hundreds of them anyway."

"I don't know…" Tatsumi remained skeptical. "Is it really okay?"

The question was less, 'is it okay to keep the book,' and more 'is it okay to still think about people I've lost even when I'm an assassin now.'

"We can talk to her when she gets here and discuss it." Lubbock suggested. "I'm sure she'll let you keep it, though. She's a teacher, and nothing excites her more than kids who are interested in learning about those things."

"All right…" Tatsumi took the book off the shelf and wrapped it in his arms, looking down at it with a small smile. "Thanks, Lubba."

"No problem."

Maybe he was making a mistake, but he could worry about that some other time. Tatsumi would eventually learn how to carry his losses, and until that happened, they would just need to be more cautious. As assassins, they were already supposed to be careful, so nothing really changed in the end.

And when Lubbock found Tatsumi in the store again, the boy was more star struck over the latest adventure book about a rubber pirate. Tatsumi would be just fine.

(l…l)

Quick question, can a teigu read? Well, that would depend on the type of teigu, wouldn't it?

Either way, the answer to that question is yes. A teigu can most certainly read, and that teigu is called Susanoo.

Susanoo had been primarily selecting books on cleaning, cooking, sewing, just about any book that covered some area of housework. Lubbock couldn't fathom why considering the teigu already excelled in all of those fields and then some. Honestly, was Susanoo even bad at _anything_?

It's no wonder the teigu was so loved by nearly everyone in Night Raid.

But even then, Lubbock would never lose Najenda to him!

He continued to watch the teigu read through the books at a virtually inhuman speed, going through them like Leone went through booze.

It was really unfair, if he thought about it. Susanoo didn't really need to rest as much as humans, he didn't really need to eat either, he could perform chores and fight ridiculously efficiently, and on top of that - even as a guy - Lubbock had to admit that Susanoo was pretty good-looking.

He bitterly wished Susanoo had _some_ kind of flaw, but the teigu _was_ keeping Najenda safe and away from the more dangerous battles.

And sure, he was jealous of the teigu to no end, but he couldn't really hate Susanoo either.

Susanoo actually re-shelved the books he read _on the right shelves_. Not only that, but Susanoo kept his store more immaculate than it had ever been! And with Susanoo's looks, more cute girls visited the store too. Susanoo was the reason his little store had gotten so much more stock and patronage in the little time he was here.

"I haaate you…!" Lubbock quietly cursed in Susanoo's general direction.

The teigu simply cocked his head in confusion.

(l…l)

Lubbock couldn't really pin down the genre that Chelsea liked to read. One day, she'd be reading the adventure book about the rubber pirate (and then spoiling it for Tatsumi). Another day, she'd be looking through the fashion catalog (and then teasing Mine about how the sniper's figure wasn't suited for the bustier dresses). Another day still, she'd be reading even dirtier books than Leone.

Chelsea's latest trend had her going through law books, dictionaries, atlases, romance novels, and baking cookbooks. Either way, she never read the same thing twice.

He wanted to talk to her about the books, but she didn't seem to like their group very much. That, and she looked like the type who wouldn't give him a straight answer.

One time at the store, however, she seemed to have fallen asleep on the couch while transformed as a cat. She seemed to like that form a lot, lately. Lubbock went to take the stack of texts she left on the table and re-shelve them.

He then made an important discovery.

"Why are there two guys on the cover of this 18 and older material?" He stared at the top book. "And why do they look eerily similar to Tatsumi and Susanoo?"

Lubbock didn't really want to flip through the pages, but he was also dreadfully curious. He set the stack down and picked up the top book only to find the second book on the stack's cover was equally baffling.

"Oh, these two look like Tatsumi and Esdeath…well, if Esdeath was a man. Why is Esdeath a man here?" He picked that up, and it all went downhill from there. "IS THAT ME AND TATSUMI?! WHAT?!" He went through the stack and watched as the covers became less and less tame, and his expression more and more incredulous.

Soon enough, he realized that the art styles were all similar. When he could calm down enough from the shock, he found that the artist for all the books was the same person.

"Ch-Chelsea drew these…?" He asked.

"Ahahahahahaha!" Chelsea woke up in her human form. "This was definitely worth it!"

"WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?!" Lubbock demanded.

"Ehh, _why_?" She cocked her head. "It's entertainment for girls, you know! And your expression was _very_ entertaining!"

"You…you're really twisted!" Lubbock flailed his arms.

"Awww, is the virgin upset over some hot sex between guys?" Chelsea teased. "You're kind of a wimp, Lubba."

Lubbock quickly re-shelved the BL books away, not wanting anything more to do with one of Night Raid's newest recruits the rest of the day. He did give her one last withering glare before he left the room, but Chelsea's victorious grin had already told him that she won this round.

Well, he still didn't know if… _that_ was supposed to be Chelsea's favorite genre. She seemed to read it with the same expression she had on every other book. She might've even been reading them just to mess with him…

But was it really worth the effort of drawing them and leaving them on the table _just_ to tease him?

Lubbock sighed loudly. Chelsea was actually _ridiculously_ good at drawing… He could only imagine how her girls might've looked if she chose to draw them.

(l…l)

"Najenda, I brought your te-!" Lubbock stopped short when he saw his boss resting on her folded arms atop the desk, fast asleep. He set the tea down and picked up the blanket he usually left in her office.

Around Najenda's desk were various thick texts about the government and laws involved in them. She was most likely doing this research for the day they killed the minister and installed a better person for the job.

Lubbock didn't know how her desk could even stand the weight of it all nearly every day, but then he wasn't sure how Najenda was holding the weight of everything on her shoulders either. He never doubted her intentions and effort in any case.

He smiled as he draped the small blanket over her. Najenda was still as beautiful as the day he first laid eyes on her, and she was so… _so_ strong too.

Being an assassin was a terrible job, but he wouldn't have substituted his position for anything else at this moment. He picked up the tea he prepared for her and gently closed the door to her office.

He walked through the dark halls of Night Raid HQ, putting the tea in the cooler to later make it a sweetened ice tea for when Najenda woke up. He then picked out a different cup and brewed some tea for himself.

He sipped the tea he made as he walked back to his quarters; it was a small bedroom, white walls lined with bookshelves, all of the same genre.

He set his tea down on the nightstand and pulled a book off the shelf.

It was silly and cheesy and had a title called, _Love Doesn't Lose._

He was a guy, not a teenage girl. He probably shouldn't be reading this dramatic fodder, but there was a certain appeal and hope that he liked about it. As silly as it sounded, he kind of drew strength from these kinds of stories.

If those whiny, beat around the bushes kind of heroes and heroines could get the one they loved to reciprocate, then what was stopping him, right?

Lubbock couldn't help but smile at the idea.

He thought fondly of Najenda as he read the clichéd messes that people called romance novels.

(l…l)

KN: Yes, my friend thought Lubbock was a romance fan. No, she did not think he even read porn, just pure cheesy clichéd dramatic romance novels. And that was the entire point of this story. Hope you enjoyed the other members' tastes, though, because I did!

KN: Also, to all the people who expected Bulat to read yaoi: Sorry, not sorry.


End file.
